Feminism

What is feminism?

Feminism is a collection of movements aimed at defining, establishing, and defending equal political, economic, and social rights for women.[1][2] In addition, feminism seeks to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment. A feminist is a “person whose beliefs and behavior are based on feminism.”[3]

Am I a feminist? Guess I am one when I fight for my own equal rights.

But sometimes I find feminists making fatal mistakes. For instance in Kerala a hair oil company is bringing out a few advertisements in favor of women and the issues they face specially in Kerala. One such is the eve teasing and harassment that occur in buses and trains. This is depicted by a woman standing amongst others with her hair let loose. But somehow instead of a feeling of empathy it only generated pity. I am not sure if it is because of the forceful way this lady delivered the dialogue or the dialogue itself. It puts off the viewers and specially men who are supposed to be the target. A woman is harassed irrespective of her hair. It is ridiculous to think that eve teasers or perverse men target only women with long hair!

There is one more about an abusive husband coming home drunk to beat the hell out of his wife. This too just does not capture the empathy of the audience. I guess a woman needs to be a woman and only then she will succeed in her attempt. She needs to find strength in her feminism. It is this same feeling that I got while reading an article that appeared on Kafila regarding the first episode that appeared on Satyameva Jayate. Amir Khan is only making an attempt and it needs to be appreciated. The whole nation is now forced to confront these issues. While Shohini Ghosh has a point, I believe that a true feminist can overcome any situation when she starts loving herself and those of her kind. An abortion becomes a very hard decision once a woman becomes a mother. How much ever one talks about a woman’s right on her body and her right to abortion, it always works against her since she is going against her own feminism. She cannot escape from the basic qualities that make her feminine. If not, even men would have been given the privilege to conceive.

Now a women opting for abortion would have many reasons. A medical situation where the mother is in danger, because of a rape and if the mother don’t want to have the baby or because if a mother feels that she cannot cope with another baby. The reasons can go on and in each instance the cause is always external. In some case it is under her control while in some like the medical case, she is not. But citing this will cause a dent to the fight against female feticide. It is a risk that women need to take in order to ensure that her kind shall survive.

If a girl child is not allowed to live then what is the point in talking about her right to abort? If she is not allowed to live then it is not just her right to abort but many others that were already taken away gradually. It is these rights that need to be established before talking about her right to abort. Let us talk about her right to education, her right to marry the one she loves when she want to, her right to live on her own if she wants to, her right to take decisions., her right to travel on the road or bus fearlessly. Oh, there are many more such rights. And maybe if these rights are restored she shall enjoy her feminism. She may take a different view on abortion and she will NEVER let another girl child die in her womb.

MTP is allowed in India and that need not interfere with the laws that shall be enacted against female feticide. This country needs to love their women better. She needs to be given the strength to bring forth others like her. If none is going to help her in this process then this strength needs to come from within. This is the time to act. This country needs to love the daughters just like the son. Let her not be equated with weakness but with strength. Let her not be treated like a commodity that needs to be protected until she is given away with a price. Her feminism is enough for her to survive and it is this inner strength that she needs to tap into.

http://kafila.org/2012/05/09/dil-se-nahin-dimaag-se-dekho-thoughts-on-satyamev-jayate-episode-1-shohini-ghosh/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSjESt5A74E&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1myhgD0nqTU&feature=relmfu
 

Girl or gold?

The latest advertisement for gold/diamond shows the birth of a baby (a girl I presume) and the next shot, the birth of a diamond or a diamond necklace! It ends up with a necklace worn by a beautiful girl with the tag “There is a diamond for every woman” . Wow! Are they giving it free?

Such advt may frighten the wits out of parents having a girl child. Why in the world do we associate girls with gold? Why do we let the media treat girls as a burden? In my opinion such adverts needs to be banned altogether specially in the backdrop of increasing female foeticide.

Let the girl child be looked upon as a normal child; not as a liability until she is flung into another’s home.

Let her be treated with dignity; not as an object to be adorned with gold and precious stones.

She is only a normal human being capable of looking after herself if you will let her be. Instead, you have a worrying father and later a brother only to transfer this gold or diamond from one bank locker to another. Look at her! How ridiculous she looks!

Then you have other adverts which implore you to invest monthly in these shops so that once your girl is grown, if nothing else, she will have bags of gold to catch a husband! Yes..it seems these husbands have only eyes for this gold and not the girl! But why should that matter? Hasn’t she been finally pushed from her home? The work of a lifetime! No wonder cowards and weaklings kill them before they are born!

Have listened to many advising me to buy gold since we have a girl. They have this frightening tone and you almost succumb to their fears. But luckily I have a hubby who continues to maintain that it is a dead investment. 

Let us invest in our girl in other ways. If someone worthy of her comes along, let him take her only for her and not for the gold!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JDQ1jV9tRU
http://funny-indian-pics.blogspot.com/2011/12/funny-indian-girl-wearing-tons-of-gold.html

Love them

Our neighbor’s daughter keeps visiting us whenever she can. She is going to be 2 years and is a very smart and loving girl. She was brought up by her grandparents since her mother came back to Kuwait after her birth. She joined her parents only recently. It is great to have her around but the other day only I was in the house since my children had gone for tuitions and hubby to cut his hair. I tried entertaining her but she was much attached to my daughter whom she missed. And then while I was sitting next to her, she took a cushion, placed it on her stretched legs and made me place my head on it. Then she started gently tapping me and saying “ba ba”.. It was such a happy moment for me. Later when I tried placing a chain on her, she removed it and wanted to dress me up! She is rightly named “Jewel” and she is being looked after like a precious jewel. Her mother leaves her with me only when she is tied up with some housework. Since I have passed that stage, I am aware how hectic it can be for her. But somehow these days my thoughts refuse to leave Afreen. As you might know she left this world which failed to love her.

Being a mother to a daughter, I know how loving they are. They need just a bit of love to blossom. They need only a bit of love to return the love in manifold. They would even be ready to die for you.

Even Afreen would have grown up the same way. But she was not allowed to. My heart cries for little ones like her who are born in the wrong place and into wrong hands. My heart weeps for her mother, who must have tried her best. I saw her crying yesterday and hope her tears won’t be in vain. The nation needs to act for future Afreens. There is no way we can hope that such monsters will not do their act. They have already been given birth are in this world and must be getting ready to marry, to hope for boys, to hope for a huge dowry and hoping to kill until they get what they want.

In India, we have the The National Commission for Protection of Child Rights (NCPCR):

The National Commission for Protection of Child Rights (NCPCR) emphasises the principle of universality and inviolability of child rights and recognises the tone of urgency in all the child related policies of the country. For the Commission, protection of all children in the 0 to 18 years age group is of equal importance.

This commission acts when they receive complaints on behalf of a child. I am sure Afreen’s mother was not in a position to complain or she did not know where to seek help. It is time this commission made every parent register as soon as a baby is born into this world. The Panchayat needs to keep track of these children too. I am sure there are enough funds. The commission also need to place cradles in every panchayat so that such unwanted babies are not killed. Maybe it is time the government started foster homes like those found in the US. From the cradles they can go into those who hope to adopt them.

There are many schemes under NCPCR one being the The Integrated Child Protection Scheme (ICPS) All States and UTs except   J&K have signed MoU to implement ICPS.

They also have monitoring schemes:

Monitoring Formats for ICPS


1. Monitoring Formats for the Central Level Monitoring


2. Monitoring Formats for the State Level Monitoring


3. Explanatory Notes


4. Online Submission of Monitoring Reports

They also have a childline service.

CHILDLINE SERVICE

This Govt. of India launched Childline Service during the year 1998-99. The child line is a 24 hours free phone service, which can be accessed by a child in distress or an adult on his behalf by dialing the number 1098 on telephone. Child line provides emergency assistance to a child and subsequently based upon the child’s need, the child is referred to an appropriate organization for long-term follow up and care.

The Kerala state has also done much in this aspect under the KERALA STATE COUNCIL FOR CHILD WELFARE.

Other than the various programs for women and child they also have a Creche Programne which takes care of children.

CRECHE PROGRAMME


The Kerala State Council for Child Welfare took on the task of setting up crèches for children of working and ailing mothers from the lower socio economic strata of society in 1975. The programme caters to children between the age group of 0-3 yerars. There are 250 creches under the control of the Council, financed by Indian council for Child Welfare These crèches serve the purpose of providing a safe, secure and healthy environment to babies, allowing older children to attend school instead of dropping out, for taking care of sibling and helping mothers to work as they are assured of the safety of their children. The services provided in these crèches include health care, supplementary nutrition, immunisation recreation as well as non formal education. A maximum of 25 children are taken care in each crèche by a trained crèche worker and a helper.

They also have electronic cradles. This needs to be in every state.

SUPPORTIVE SERVICES OF KERALA  STATE COUNCIL FOR CHILD WELFARE

ELECTRONIC CRADLE

Every Child has a right to live. Unfortunate occasions (!) compel persons to discard their babies. Such abandonment in public unhygienic places threaten their lives. To save these kids Council have established an Electronic Cradle (Ammathottil) on 14th November 2002. Now there are Electronic Cradles in all the districts in Kerala.

These babies if lucky might find a good and loving home from adoption centres. One such called Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services sources kids from India.

Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services (JOH) is passionate about adoption – we truly believe that adoption is a win-win situation for the child and the adopting parents and playing a role in it is a tremendous joy

Let the girl child live. She will never let you down.

Edited to add:

Maxwell Pereira, a former Joint Commissioner of Police for the New Delhi Range of the Capital City, says that female infanticide happens at a larger scale in affluent societies than in underprivileged neighborhoods.



“In Delhi, again South Delhi has the highest percentage”, he said in an interview with CNN IBN

http://www.firstpost.com/india/female-infanticide-affluent-south-delhi-tops-capital-chart-273279.html

http://wcd.nic.in/
http://wcd.nic.in/icpsmon/st_mf.aspx
http://www.hindu.com/2009/02/11/stories/2009021151940300.htm
http://journeysoftheheart.net/india.html

Born at the wrong place!

If they are not killed in the womb, they are tortured while under their care!

How can a father beat, bite or posion a 3 year old helpless child only since it is of a gender that he never wanted? Did he not have a mother of the same gender or did he just fall from the sky? Oh you weakling!

The Bangalore Police arrested a man on Sunday on charge of battering his three-month-old daughter as he wanted a son and was allegedly unhappy with the delivery of the baby girl instead. Sustaining serious head injuries, the infant has since been battling for life in the intensive care unit (ICU) of a city hospital.

The police said the accused, Umar Farooq, had attacked the baby girl, Afreen, twice in the past. The incident of the baby’s suspected torture by her father came to light when her mother Reshma Bano took the infant to government-run Vani Vilas Hospital for treatment

Hope this man is jailed forever.

http://indiatoday.intoday.in/story/bangalore-father-batters-three-month-old-daughter/1/183622.html
http://obehiokoawo.blogspot.com/

And why?

One thought education and means would save our girls. But the latest report by The Lancet tells us that it is those mothers with lesser education and wealth but with a better sense of responsibility who seems to be saving our girls.

The conditional sex ratio for second-order births when the firstborn was a girl fell from 906 per 1000 boys (99% CI 798–1013) in 1990 to 836 (733–939) in 2005; an annual decline of 0•52% (p for trend=0∙002).

Declines were much greater in mothers with 10 or more years of education than in mothers with no education, and in wealthier households compared with poorer households. By contrast, we did not detect any significant declines in the sex ratio for second-order births if the firstborn was a boy, or for firstborns.

Between the 2001 and 2011 censuses, more than twice the number of Indian districts (local administrative areas) showed declines in the child sex ratio as districts with no change or increases. After adjusting for excess mortality rates in girls, our estimates of number of selective abortions of girls rose from 0–2•0 million in the 1980s, to 1•2–4•1 million in the 1990s, and to 3•1–6•0 million in the 2000s. Each 1% decline in child sex ratio at ages 0–6 years implied 1•2–3•6 million more selective abortions of girls. Selective abortions of girls totalled about 4•2–12•1 million from 1980–2010, with a greater rate of increase in the 1990s than in the 2000s.

We did not yet see any clear evidence of selective abortion of firstborn female fetuses. This is partly because India does not enforce a one-child policy, which led to the selective abortion of firstborn female fetuses in China. However, selective abortions of first-order girls might increase if fertility drops further, particularly in urban areas.

The following maps are from the 2011 Census report.

Country wise Child Sex Ratio in age 0-6 (Year 2001 vs 2011)

Ranked State/UT wise for Year 2011

Ranked distict wise for Year 2011

Even Kerala’s sex ratio within the 1-6 range is declining.

Has Kerala too started killing their girls?

With the Indian setup in mind, it would not be fair to blame just the mother since the decision making and even power seldom rests with the mother alone in most households. Yet, let me blame those mothers who are educated and have financial means, since they have failed to exercise their position. They have succumbed to the cultural norms and failed to curb an evil practice when they could.

It is time the educated women in India stopped blaming men alone for all the woes.

What have these mothers gained from education if they fail to love/protect their own lot. Why have they failed to give a chance to girls like themselves? Is it the mother in India who yearns for a boy child more than the father?

And if education alone will not curb this, then only jail terms shall.

The Indian Government implemented a Pre-Natal Diagnostic Techniques Act in 1996 to prevent the misuse of techniques for the purpose of prenatal sex determination leading to selective abortion of girls.22 It is unlikely that this Act has been effective nationally because few health providers have been charged or convicted.

But this act has not been effective:

Furthermore, the PNDT Act itself provides scanty information about what penalties would apply either to doctors performing s*x determination tests or to in-laws and family members forcing women to seek them.

And these tests are still done under different pretexts and the information conveyed in “innovative” ways. Even sign languages!

‘Laddu’ Means A Boy, `Barfi’ A Girl A `V’ sign would normally mean `victory’. But in some northern States of the country, a doctor uses this sign after ultrasonograhpy of a pregnant woman to indicate, “Voila, it’s a son!”

If the doctor asks the patient to come back on a Friday, it means it is a girl she is carrying and she should return for an abortion. And if he says, “Let’s meet on Monday”, it means its going to be a boy.

“Our planners and policy makers have not understood the grip of the son complex in Indian society, nor have our sociologists and behavioural scientists done enough research on the subject,” the study notes.

The study, which covered Kurukshetra in Haryana, Fateh Saheb in Punjab and Kangra district in Himachal Pradesh, categorically states that female foeticide was the result of an unholy alliance between the traditional preference for a son and modern medical technology, increasing greed of doctors and rising the demand for dowry that makes daughters financial burdens.

One of the main reasons that the PNDT Act has failed is “because of the connivance of doctors in s*x determination and selective abortions.” These procedures have become lucrative business for many of India’s medical practitioners.

For further reading.

http://www.lawyersclubindia.com/forum/pre-natal-diagnosis-test-act-1519.asp
http://www.thelancet.com/
http://www.censusindia.gov.in/2011census/training/district_pdf_search/district_pdf.aspx

A very Happy New Year

Let me wish everyone a Very Happy and Prosperous New Year 2010.

…and for those who have taken 2012 seriously, please remember that you have 2 more years to fulfill your ambitions, be happy and give other’s happiness..

and for the rest of you who believe that this world is never going to end (during your lifetime), better work towards making it good so that it remains good while you 🙂 last.. or at least good enough for your children so that they can take it up from where you left.

Let me leave a few links of blogs/newspapers that are reporting happy news from around the world…Yes we sure need them…

The one below is from a report on the co-author of “Three Cups of Tea”.. his work is mainly in Afganisthan..

that in 2000, there were 800,000 kids in school in Afghanistan, and this was during the height of the Taliban. The kids were nearly all boys. Today, there are 8.4 million children in school in Afghanistan, including 2.5 million females. So it’s the greatest increase in school enrollment in any country in modern history and the goal is 13 million.

I think that’s why I feel that educating girls is so important. If you educate a boy, you educate an individual but if you educate a girl, you educate a whole community.

The next is from goodnewsindia website which stopped spreading good news in the Year 2006 and for which the author has given a lengthy explanation. Please take time to read it through. He is now engaged in another fruitful venture.

“Given India’s history of throwing up influential people, waiting for a Gandhi is not an unrealistic act. But we can do something while we wait and do a bit of what he counseled: You cannot change others; but you can change yourself. If bad news depresses you, you can do something that radiates good news; so, become the good news and you begin to change the world. Indeed Gandhi deemed the greatest change we can ever seek is the change in ourselves. Feel the power of his insight: “As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world – that is the myth of the atomic age – as in being able to remake ourselves.” [How I love this man! He knew the modern age was a myth; it believes all the water we need can be delivered in bottles.]

Reflecting further, I understood consuming less and consuming with sensitivity is also to contribute to conservation and/or production; without any measurable productive act, a sensitive consumer can contribute to production and begin to bridge the divide inside her.

Let me also post the reason why the author chose the name “point to return”..

“…the point is to return” says the tagline. And that can be read in many ways.
Return to your roots
Return to nature and to learning from it
Return something to the earth for gifts received and resources enjoyed.

The author has inspired many.. and if one reads the comments one gets to know how many were inspired enough to start their own ventures; yes.. how Solar Energy, Green Houses, Rainwater Harvesting etc. can make a positive change to our environment…

Volunteers at work…

Point to return has its presence in twitter too.

Let me sign off with a quote from him…

Just as one must believe in God despite the priest, one must hope farming can be made attractive despite the intruding professional agricultural scientists.

International Day of the Girl Child

Yesterday, September 24th was celeberated as the International Day of the Girl Child without much fanfare..

Unlike other “International days”, there is nothing much in this day for creating any fanfare.

No cards nor gifts to gift anyone and hence none to sell them.

Many of those girl children who survived in this world still live a life with not much recognition.

But then there are many who never saw the light only because she was meant to be born as a girl.

We let a caring sister, wife, mother, grandmother die a premature death.

The world saw in 2005 through the eyes of Dr. Hoa Phuong Tran(one among many) the below:

A study in India of seven hundred pregnant women undergoing a genetic amniocentesis test revealed that less than one in twenty of the women who were informed they were carrying a daughter actually continued with thepregnancy3. Female foeticide is a direct result of deep-rooted discriminatory attitudes and women’s perceived low worth. When I first went to India some years ago, I was shocked to discover that even though the Government had banned the payment of dowry, in poor areas, the practice still dominates the life and the mindset of virtually all poor families. Hence the belief that girls are a burden of little worth.

An excerpt from Gender – The view from below*
Prepared by
Dr. Hoa Phuong Tran

And we continue to see it not only among the poor but also among the affluent and from one city to another it is spreading like cancer.

Report says girl child not wanted in Bangalore

IANS
24 Sep 2008 02:51:00 PM IST

BANGALORE: As the world observed International Day of the Girl Child Wednesday, India’s IT hub presented a poor picture of itself with a Karnataka government report indicating declining child sex ratio.

The ratio in Karnataka has fallen drastically from 960 to 946 between 1991 and 2001, when the last census was conducted.

The ratio stood at 954 in rural areas and 939 in urban areas. Bangalore has a ratio of 941, much lower than some poorer districts like Kolar, in its neighbourhood and Bidar in north Kanataka. The national average is 927/1000, according to 2001 Census.

Is it not time to wake up?

Kerala and its ratio

Maddy’s comments set me thinking why Kerala has a better ratio though I have no answer as to why the development of the state is not in par. Of course we end up with the answer: because it has high literacy. So is education the key? But then selective abortion has started among the educated Keralites too as per reports.

But yet Kerala is still ahead of the rest of the states. Maybe because of the Marumakkathayam system which was prevalent ealier? According to Wikipedia “Marumakkathayam” is a matrilinear system of inheritance followed by castes of Kerala like some Brahmin families (Payanoor Nambootiris)[citation needed] , Ambalavasis, Royal /Nair families, some Ezhavas, upper class Mappilas in Kerala state, south India. It is exceptional in the sense that it was one of the few traditional systems that gave women liberty, and right to property. Under this system, women enjoyed respect, prestige and power. In the matrilinear system, the family lived together in a tharavadu which comprised of a mother, her brothers and younger sisters, and her children. The oldest male member was known as the karanavar and was the head of the household and managed the family estate. Lineage was traced through the mother, and the children “belonged” to the mother’s family. All family property was jointly owned. In the event of a partition, the shares of the children were clubbed with that of the mother. The karanavar’s property was inherited by his nephews and not his sons.

Here the most important aspect to be noted is that a woman was given liberty and right to property. She enjoyed respect, prestige and power while at the same time the oldest male member was the head of the household.

Then again another point is that due to the education imparted , the Kerala girls are able to earn for themselves. They were ready to go beyond their own states and even to other coutries (Gulf, US etc) to support their families. I guess this made them an asset rather than a liablity and hence they were let to live!

The ratio tells it all..

Some still dont believe that India has a skewed sex ratio.. so please check it out officially

Sponsoring a girl child

I am sure we can do much for the girl child and it costs us not much as detailed by Roop Rai in her post that I copied below:

Nanhi Kali: Sponsor education of a little girl

Nanhi Kali (loosely translated as little girl) is a project jointly managed by K C Mahindra Education Trust and Naandi Foundation in India to promote and finance education for under-privileged girl children. For as little as Rs. 1800 per year, you can sponsor education for one of the girls studying between Grade 1 and Grade 7, and for Rs. 2700 per yer, education of a girl studying between Grade 8 and Grade 12 can be financed.

Rs. 1800 a year = only 22 GBP/year, 44 CAD/year, and 45 USD/year
Rs. 2700 a year = just 34 GBP/year, 66 CAD/year, and 67 USD/year
Please visit XE.com for updated conversion rates.

I was sent a brief by Nanhi Kali yesterday when I rang them for information. The brief is as follows:

Shreya’s parents can’t send her to school.
Can you?

If you can’t, the chances are she will end up housebound, exploited as a maid or a child prostitute, be married off early and could even die during childbirth!

We write on behalf of thousands of girls who like Shreya, are forced to dropout of schools because their families cannot afford to keep them there. It is official knowledge that out of every 10 girls who enrol in Std I, only 3 complete Std X. Education for a girl child born to a poor family is still a pipe dream.

The Nanhi Kali project intends to make this appalling fact, history. With your help we can make it sooner.

How you can help:

Sponsor a Nanhi Kali. Be her guardian. Give her the assurance that no matter what trials her family faces she will never have to drop out of school. Your sponsorship will provide her with study material, uniforms and learning support. It will also be used to work with her teachers to create a learning-friendly environment in the government school she goes to.
− To keep a girl in school from Std I – VII, the per annum cost is Rs 1800
− To ensure an older girl continues her schooling from Std VIII – X the per annum cost is Rs 2500

As a guardian:

You will receive a profile of your Nanhi Kali with a photograph. You will also receive half yearly updates about her, so you can track her progress.

To Sponsor a Nanhi Kali you can donate online through http://www.nanhikali.org

For more information, please contact me at unchaahiATgmailDOTcom or Gauri at r.gauriATmahindraDOTcom.

Me and husband will be sponsoring two girls (one each from both groups) and I’ll share my story here as it unfolds. I look forward to hear from more sponsors.